getting kicked out of the library

Hunter had ABA therapy this morning for two hours, followed by swim lessons, a quick thirty minute break, and then four more hours of ABA.  We played sound bingo with all the kids and decided to

 

make a trip to the library to return our books and check out some new reads.  The library is always an interesting trip for our family...sometimes we can make it out of there and no one makes a peep, or there are other instances where we become the spectacle.  However, I can't deny my family the opportunity to excel their love of reading and exploring new books. 

So off we went to the library, with our bag of books, our ABA therapist, and hopes for a smooth trip.

When we entered the library, we realized it was very crowded, but we reminded all of our inside, quiet library voices.  Paige and Hunter went to the computers and Peyton and I searched for some books. 

 

Hunter's computer was not working very well, so he went to search for his limit of two movies, and find some new books.  We were doing well, all ready to check out when Hunter realized he didn't have the three books I told him he could check out.  Paige told him there were Superwhy books and she led him to the section.  Hunter was holding his two Lightning McQueen books in his hands, and set them on the shelf to look through the Superwhy books.  As quick as he set them down, a little boy grabbed the books and walked towards his mother.  When Hunter looked back at the shelf and realized his books were gone, he became very upset and said, "He took my books!"  As the mother patronizingly said, "Honey, it looks like that little boy is upset about those books.  Do you need those?" and then continued to walk away, Hunter became very upset.  A full screaming session began and as Lara and I both tried to have him use his words and calm down, a librarian walked quickly up to us, as my back was turned and said, "Do you need my help to check out?  Can you take this in the hall?"

 

I turned around and asked, "Did you ask me if I could go in the hallway?" 

 

"Yes, it is getting pretty loud."

 

I took a deep breath and as much as I knew I should take his hand and walk away without a word, I looked at her and said, "My son has special needs.  We are trying the best we can." 

 

At that point, Hunter was hysterical and his therapist followed him as he ran away, screaming.  The librarian apologized and said, "I didn't know.  I can check these books out for you.  I'm sorry- I didn't know." 

 

As I attempted to recheck the books that we had started to check out, she apologized again.  I told her, "Just coming into this library is a big deal.  We are doing the best we can.  It is part of his therapy," as Lara was leading him out of the library, still screaming about his McQueen books.

 

The most frustrating part of being a mom of a child with an Autism Spectrum Disorder is not feeling like I'm the bottom of the barrel when it comes to discipline.  It's not having to deal with ignorance, when others quickly jump to conclusions and "politely" kick you out.  It's not the strength it takes to not scream right back, "Life is not fair!!!"

 

It's that my son can't simply tell another peer that he took his books.  "Hey, buddy- I picked those books out.  I just set them down for a minute to get another.  Can I have them back?" 

 

Instead, he goes into "fight or flight" mode, and unfortunately, he takes flight.

 

My son can't fight for himself.

 

And that is the exact reason I will continue to do it for him. 

 

We are going to defeat this unfair, heart-breaking, gut wrenching disorder otherwise known as Autism.