second day= better for one, embarrassing for the other
We decided to have Peter drop Hunter off this morning, since that will be the regular routine on his way to work. He parked the car and walked up to the gym, but the teacher wasn't at the door. The wait time increased the anxiety, and when Hunter saw his teacher walk up, he started hitting Peter and tried to flee. Two teachers brought him into the gym and Peter left.
I was so hoping this morning would be different! We had long chats yesterday about having nice hands, the expectations at school, etc. I emailed the teacher during the morning, hoping to get a response since I knew he was left in a rage. No one responded.
I can't take the unknown! Trying so hard not to be the helicopter parent, but at the same time, he has a long school career ahead of him, and we need to start off on the right foot.
This morning, I was questioning whether we made the right decision to send him to the public school instead of a private school for higher functioning children on the spectrum/ADD/other issues. But then I realized- no matter where I sent him this week, whether it was a school for free or a school for $1 million dollars- he would STILL be having trouble with transition. So I took a deep breath and tried to let go...of course, until 11:50 pick up time.
I saw him walking towards us, this time in the middle of the line as opposed to the back of the line. The district behavioral specialist, as well as one of the special ed teachers was walking behind the line. He spotted me and waved, and then tried to hurry out of the line, but quickly stepped back with his peers. When he was close enough, after another cute wave, he ran up to me and screamed, "Mommy! I turned around the hitting and kicking and had a great day!!!!"
I looked at his teachers and they both nodded their heads. He had trouble until about 8:05, but once he entered the kindergarten room, they basically sat at the window and observed.
Prayers answered.
I knew he could do this- but I didn't know if he could handle the anxiety of the new situation. Many kindergarten kiddos have trouble adjusting to the big school. I remember how tired Paige was that first week- she was asleep by 7 every night and we had to wake her twelve hours later her kindergarten year.
And here he was, second day of "big school" and he had a successful day. He also told me that he sat by friends at lunch and played on the playground.
I do have to mention the possible motivator- he was up at 5:30 this morning, and he ran in our room. "Mommy! There are new lightning mcqueens on the top of the fridge!!" He had found my secret stash of prizes. However, I told him this afternoon he would not get a new car until his hitting was gone.
After lunch, we practiced getting out of the car through the loop to prepare him for the morning tomorrow; hoping he will actually get out of the car and enter the building.
I went to Paige's room after we got home because she told me that her day started off bad but got better. She told me that everyone was staring at her when Hunter was screaming in the gym. She said that several friends who didn't know Hunter walked up to her and asked her 1) if he was her brother 2) why he was screaming and 3) why he had two teachers holding him like he was being carried by the police.
She told me she was embarrassed.
This is one of the first, but definitely not the last times she will be embarrassed by Hunter. She told the friends that he didn't like the loud noise, but told me that she really didn't like everyone staring at her. I tried to explain to her that if another child walked into the gym and was screaming and hitting, she would probably turn and stare, too.
She said, "No I wouldn't, Mommy! Because I have a brother like Hunter and I would know not to stare."
Can you get a more perfect, more sincere, more admirable response from a seven year old?
Those children who stared today will probably stare tomorrow. And then they will probably stare the next day. And the next.
But sooner or later, those children will get to know Hunter, and they, too, will stop staring and asking questions the next time they encounter a child having a difficult time.
Little do they know, but he is blessing their lives with the gift of acceptance.
And that is a priceless gift.
I was so hoping this morning would be different! We had long chats yesterday about having nice hands, the expectations at school, etc. I emailed the teacher during the morning, hoping to get a response since I knew he was left in a rage. No one responded.
I can't take the unknown! Trying so hard not to be the helicopter parent, but at the same time, he has a long school career ahead of him, and we need to start off on the right foot.
This morning, I was questioning whether we made the right decision to send him to the public school instead of a private school for higher functioning children on the spectrum/ADD/other issues. But then I realized- no matter where I sent him this week, whether it was a school for free or a school for $1 million dollars- he would STILL be having trouble with transition. So I took a deep breath and tried to let go...of course, until 11:50 pick up time.
I saw him walking towards us, this time in the middle of the line as opposed to the back of the line. The district behavioral specialist, as well as one of the special ed teachers was walking behind the line. He spotted me and waved, and then tried to hurry out of the line, but quickly stepped back with his peers. When he was close enough, after another cute wave, he ran up to me and screamed, "Mommy! I turned around the hitting and kicking and had a great day!!!!"
I looked at his teachers and they both nodded their heads. He had trouble until about 8:05, but once he entered the kindergarten room, they basically sat at the window and observed.
Prayers answered.
I knew he could do this- but I didn't know if he could handle the anxiety of the new situation. Many kindergarten kiddos have trouble adjusting to the big school. I remember how tired Paige was that first week- she was asleep by 7 every night and we had to wake her twelve hours later her kindergarten year.
And here he was, second day of "big school" and he had a successful day. He also told me that he sat by friends at lunch and played on the playground.
I do have to mention the possible motivator- he was up at 5:30 this morning, and he ran in our room. "Mommy! There are new lightning mcqueens on the top of the fridge!!" He had found my secret stash of prizes. However, I told him this afternoon he would not get a new car until his hitting was gone.
After lunch, we practiced getting out of the car through the loop to prepare him for the morning tomorrow; hoping he will actually get out of the car and enter the building.
I went to Paige's room after we got home because she told me that her day started off bad but got better. She told me that everyone was staring at her when Hunter was screaming in the gym. She said that several friends who didn't know Hunter walked up to her and asked her 1) if he was her brother 2) why he was screaming and 3) why he had two teachers holding him like he was being carried by the police.
She told me she was embarrassed.
This is one of the first, but definitely not the last times she will be embarrassed by Hunter. She told the friends that he didn't like the loud noise, but told me that she really didn't like everyone staring at her. I tried to explain to her that if another child walked into the gym and was screaming and hitting, she would probably turn and stare, too.
She said, "No I wouldn't, Mommy! Because I have a brother like Hunter and I would know not to stare."
Can you get a more perfect, more sincere, more admirable response from a seven year old?
Those children who stared today will probably stare tomorrow. And then they will probably stare the next day. And the next.
But sooner or later, those children will get to know Hunter, and they, too, will stop staring and asking questions the next time they encounter a child having a difficult time.
Little do they know, but he is blessing their lives with the gift of acceptance.
And that is a priceless gift.
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