why you should admit mistakes to your children
I read a parenting article a long time ago, with a message that has stuck with me. Your children need to see that you admit mistakes as well. When explaining to your child that you "messed up," they learn the value of asking for forgiveness. They also come to the realization that mommy and daddy aren't perfect either! I mean, we are pretty much heroic in their eyes...we fix boo boos, we magically make sweet treats and meals appear, and we love them unconditionally. We come to their rescue in any time of need, like Batman, Superman, or even Superwhy. In asking for forgiveness, your child learns that mistakes can not only be made, but forgiven and forgotten.
Today was pj day at the private preschool. We picked out Hunter's jammies the night before, placed a flashlight in his bag, and thought he was set for the day. He told me, "I need to bring my pillow, mommy!" I wasn't sure that this was the case, so I told him it would have to stay at home, and I forgot to stick it in the car before we left for school (just in case he was correct). When I picked him up early for his IOP, he told me he had a hard day and that he "cried alot." He shrugged his shoulders and said, "I guess I don't get the ipad today." When we got in the car, after some questioning, he told me he threw his flashlight and had to go to the office. Well, when two of Hunter's friends had walked in with their pillows and lovies, Hunter broke down. He threw his flashlight, broke it, and had a hard time regaining composure the rest of the day. I anticipated a challenging day due to the change in schedule, but was hopeful that he would enjoy the super fun day they had planned (celebrating Dr. Suess with real green eggs and ham, stories in their jammies, etc).
After I found out not having his pillow sent him over the edge, I felt so guilty...I could have prevented part of that! So in the car on the way home from the IOP, I apologized to Hunter. I told him it was my fault that he didn't have his pillow and asked for forgiveness. "I wish I would have brought my silky blankie, green bear or Deuce (a stuffed animal), too. But it's OK mommy, I had a blanket on my napmat."
He can do it! He can think through a situation and problem solve and figure out a way to improvise. Typically, he needs order and consistency, but he also has to learn that life will throw curveballs and you have to be ready for the catch. I explained to him that sometimes I forget things, like my notebooks, or my sandwich for lunch, but I can still be OK and find another way to make it right. I had him repeat, Mommies make mistakes, too. I hope it sunk in...and that he somehow realized that even though he had a hard day, he can make it right tomorrow. And the next time something doesn't go as planned, I am hoping he doesn't overreact, but handle it with grace and remember that even superheroes can make mistakes.
Today was pj day at the private preschool. We picked out Hunter's jammies the night before, placed a flashlight in his bag, and thought he was set for the day. He told me, "I need to bring my pillow, mommy!" I wasn't sure that this was the case, so I told him it would have to stay at home, and I forgot to stick it in the car before we left for school (just in case he was correct). When I picked him up early for his IOP, he told me he had a hard day and that he "cried alot." He shrugged his shoulders and said, "I guess I don't get the ipad today." When we got in the car, after some questioning, he told me he threw his flashlight and had to go to the office. Well, when two of Hunter's friends had walked in with their pillows and lovies, Hunter broke down. He threw his flashlight, broke it, and had a hard time regaining composure the rest of the day. I anticipated a challenging day due to the change in schedule, but was hopeful that he would enjoy the super fun day they had planned (celebrating Dr. Suess with real green eggs and ham, stories in their jammies, etc).
After I found out not having his pillow sent him over the edge, I felt so guilty...I could have prevented part of that! So in the car on the way home from the IOP, I apologized to Hunter. I told him it was my fault that he didn't have his pillow and asked for forgiveness. "I wish I would have brought my silky blankie, green bear or Deuce (a stuffed animal), too. But it's OK mommy, I had a blanket on my napmat."
He can do it! He can think through a situation and problem solve and figure out a way to improvise. Typically, he needs order and consistency, but he also has to learn that life will throw curveballs and you have to be ready for the catch. I explained to him that sometimes I forget things, like my notebooks, or my sandwich for lunch, but I can still be OK and find another way to make it right. I had him repeat, Mommies make mistakes, too. I hope it sunk in...and that he somehow realized that even though he had a hard day, he can make it right tomorrow. And the next time something doesn't go as planned, I am hoping he doesn't overreact, but handle it with grace and remember that even superheroes can make mistakes.
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